Honesty is not always the best policy

So kids have the ability to either lift up your self esteem--or crush you.
Logan is a crusher...unfortunately. He was on one yesterday.

First, he was sitting next to me on the couch, touching my hair. (He's a big toucher) He breaks the "too touchy on the momma bubble" rule constantly. Then his hands were on my neck pinching me, and it hurt. "Stop it," I cried out, pushing his hands away. He only giggled, and then squeezed my neck again. "Whats this big brown thing? Its huge."

Well I always happened to think that my mole was medium sized. Not large enough for people to get caught looking with bulging eyes, and not small enough not to notice either. Thanks Logan.


The second thing that happened was that a few hours later, we were on the couch together again, and this time his hands went to my lips, where they started to fan upwards. "Mommy, you have tons of hair on your mouth," he pointed out, as his hands were feathering up and down on my upper lip hair. "It's so furry."

Thanks again, Logan.

The third incident was the worst one. We were at the store together, in a book aisle, looking around. He was right next to me. Now let me explain that we have been eating a giant pot of taco soup over the past few nights. It has an assortment of beans. Our family eats beans weekly, but taco soup is the only thing that really makes me gassy. So to lead you to the next embarrassing moment, which I'm sure you already have an idea of....a little one squeaked on out...out of nowhere. Naturally, we were not the only ones in the aisle. As soon as it happened, I quickly reached to the shelf and rustled a few books pages, hoping to disguise it.

A loud, laughing voice next to me cried out, "Momma, did you just fart?"

In hushed tones, I quickly tried to persuade him that no, I was just making some noise with the books. But he just giggled, "No, Momma. I heard you. You farted."

I was so embarrassed and he would not shut up. He kept saying out loud that I farted and he thought it was hilarious.

What a great day.
I learned that I have a HUGE honking mole on my neck.
Apparently I have a mustache.
And I fart as entertainment for the whole world.

Isn't life great?


Thanks Logan