Hmmm

So, this new blog page is totally not me. I'm not black with white and pink fairy dust. I'm completely earthy. I love green, blue, brown, and orange. But I'm trying something new...something I don't do very much. When I find something I like, I stick with it. Just like I never order anything other than an oriental chicken salad at Applebees. I could try something else, but I just don't want to. I love that salad. And I'm a person who doesn't like to waste money and the few times I have tried something new, I've been a little disappointed. I couldn't help but be a little annoyed that I spent money on changing my mind.

This is all based on the fact that I do not eat out that much. Especially while Jonny is in school. That keeps my constants...fairly fresh. If I ate out often, I'm sure I'd be more apt to try out more. Right now I am just rambling, because my hubby just left on his three month internship adventure. Since I no longer have anyone adult to talk to, I'm talking to my blog. Pretty lame, I know.

It's just me and the little one, since big brother is at school a good part of the day. It's blisteringly cold outside, so we pretty much stay indoors. We are in a small town, so there's not much to do, but somehow we manage to entertain ourselves. The only hard part of the day is the evening, when daddy won't be coming home to help relieve my parenting duties. I don't know what it is about 4:30- but that is crazy time around here. The kids are begging for something to eat and I'm yelling that dinner is very very soon. CHill Out. You won't die from starvation. Then once dinner is over, the kids go super crazy playing like hyper monkeys. The house gets messy, the toys are everywhere. And they are way too wired to go to bed. At about seven o clock, they seem to calm down (That may be due to the fact that I might have turned a cartoon on) But the moment you mention "lets get ready for bed" they purposely start jumping around, acting like monkeys again. It takes a lot to keep my cool during this. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes not. Bedtime goes smoothly sometimes, but often not. All I really care about after I get them down, is getting me down. I love relaxing on our big couch. I love it when a decent tv show happens to be on. I love to unwind. It is necessary.

I know that someone once told me that as they looked back on their earlier parenting days, they wished they would have chilled out more and slowed down. They were always in a hurry to get the toys picked up. Always in a hurry to get the kids to bed. Always getting overworked about every little thing. They wished they would have slowed down and enjoyed their children more. I agree with that. I'm sure I'll look back and wish the same thing. I do have times of the day when I relax and enjoy my kiddies. But I'm tired at the end of the day. I don't blame myself for wanting to get them the heck out of the way so I can have a little me time. It's not much. And I need it.

When my little one wakes me up the next morning, I smile when I see his little face, ready to enjoy my kids and take on the new day. Its a system that goes round and round. Good morning-smiles-enjoyment-busyness- playtimes-frustration-smiles-time outs-hugs-scoldings-meals-storytimes-singing-more scolding-couch time-sigh-goodnight.

What a life.